What's the story, enthusiasts of exaggerated enmity?!
This week, I have a rather interesting match on offer for review. One of the more polarizing matches I've watched in some time, the internet can't seen to decide if they think this match is the hottest thing since sliced bread, or the worst thing NJPW has done in years. Honestly, I'm somewhere in the middle, and am going to try and thread the needle a bit here and play to both sides. Maybe by the end of this review I'll have a much better opinion, but I write this intro paragraph a mere hour after watching the match and am still undecided about how I truly feel!
Let's take a walk together, shall we?
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| NJPW |
Here's what I watched for the week;
Dorrance "Dory" Funk Jr. - 1941-2026
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| Via NBC News |
Son of professional wrestler Dorrance "Dory" Funk Sr; Dory Funk Jr. often shared the wrestling spotlight with his better known brother, Terry Funk. Despite not having the fruitful or legendary career his brother managed to achieve, Dory was a legend in his own right, winning a litany of championships and awards across his 61 year career. A champion wherever he want and a pillar of the NWA across his entire career, 19 of his 26 unique title reigns were NWA Championships. Holding the NWA World Heavyweight Champion once for 1563 days, the NWA Western States Tag Team Championship 7 times, for (disputed) 588 days, and the NWA Florida Heavyweight Championship 4 times for (disputed) 1209 days, Dory became synonymous with respect and tenure in the world of wrestling.
Alongside his brother Terry, Dory wrestled incredible tag bouts against a veritable who's-who of wrestling across the world. Hulk Hogan, Bruiser Brody, The Shiek, Abdullah the Butcher, Riki Choshu, The Great Kabuki, The Road Warriors and Genichiro Tenryu to name only a handful. On his own, Dory more than held his own against the likes of Antonio Inoki, Dick Murdoch, Giant Baba, Jumbo Tsuruta, Gene Kinishi and Harley Race. The former he beat to win the NWA World Heavyweight Championship, the latter he lost to to end his reign.
Outside of the brilliant lights of television and territory wrestling, Dory coached the stars of tomorrow at the Funking Conservatory. Some of the most well known names to be trained by Dory, at the Conservatory and outside it's walls, are Kurt Angle, Edge, Matt and Jeff Hardy, Christopher Daniels, Chris Sabin, Jumbo Tsuruta, and Genichiro Tenryu.
Regardless of your opinions on Dory, that he lived in the shadow of his brother and never reached the same legendary status, he was an underrated champion, he's often overlooked or seen as "boring," modern wrestling as we know it was shaped in part by Dory. He trained some of the most important names in the industry, some of which went on to train another generation of wrestlers in their own right, thereby passing down Dory's knowledge and lessons. His style of wrestling influenced the technical style that is practised by some of the more gifted and knowledgeable in the sport, and he played the "straight man" to Terry's wild, often times brawl-heavy style in some of their more famous tag matches.
All I know is this; The Funk's are reunited in the big ring in the sky, tearing it up in some of the wildest, craziest, most insane matches you could possibly dream up. Rest easy, Dory.
| Match | Show | Date |
|---|---|---|
| Yota Tsuji vs. Yuto-Ice | NJPW G1 Climax 36 - Day 8 | 07/29/2026 |
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| A test for Unbound Co. NJPW |
Basic Breakdown
The main event of Day 8 of NJPW's G1 Climax tournament, two members of Unbound Company find themselves going nose to nose in this match. I'll be totally honest, aside from Yota Tsuji being the IWGP Heavyweight Champion currently, I'd have totally let this match pass me by, much like I am letting the G1 pass me by. I'm sorry, guys, I've tried to get into the G1 many years ago, but as someone who only has a passing interest in NJPW, I really don't have it in me to watch *checks notes* 19 shows in 37 days. I'm struggling to just watch what I need to watch for my Watchlists, if you guys haven't noticed. Depression is a bitch. I like the round robin format they do, but I only know a handful of the wrestlers well enough to care, and I have a white hot hatred for Jake Lee, so this years G1 is a hard pass for me.
What made me check this match out over, say, a Shingo Takagi or Konosuke Takeshita match, was the amount of discussion I saw for it online. I was shocked to see the rating for this on CAGEMATCH when I was aimlessly catching up on recent events one morning. An 8.82 (at the time of writing) with a staggering 108 10's?! What did these guys do?! I mean, I know Tsuji is great, even if his reign has been iffy, but Yuto-Ice? The Knockout Brothers guy? I mean, sure, their team is stellar, but is he really that good? "I gotta check this match out," I told myself, holding out until I got back from Montreal (as I detailed last week) to watch this match and hopefully give it a review spotlight.
Initially, I was tempted to give the semi-main event match the spotlight, Hirooki Goto vs. Shingo Takagi, but after reading some of the CAGEMATCH comments for this match, I decided that it's divisiveness would be the exact reason I'd give it the spotlight this week. Sure, I can review a match that is universally praised or hated, but I wanted to weigh in and give my two cents on a match that seems to have a lot of people undecided. Was this a Match of the Year contender? Or was it the drizzling shits?
Bell To Bell
When the bell rings, the crowd begins chanting for Yuto-Ice, chanting "ICE! ICE! ICE!" which means something totally different in America given the current political climate. I can only assume it refers to the "Ice" he wears around his neck, lending a term from hip-hop culture.
Right from the work go, Yuto is challenging Yota Tsuji to chop his chest, leaving it wide open for him to lay in a shot. Tsuji looks to happily oblige, but he instead lays in a knee as the opening shot. Rebounding off the ropes, Tsuji ducks a forearm and dodges a boot, finally blocking a boot from Yuto before laying in the first chop of the match. I'd tell you guys at home to keep track, cause there are a lot of chops, but I'd break my laptop if I typed out "chop" for each one that was landed. I also just refuse to do it, so there.
Something important to note about Tsuji's chop style, is his are "overhand," more like a baseball pitch than the "Flair" style chops American fans are more used to. I've also seen them described as "lucha chops," which is a pretty good way of describing them as well, as most luchadores I've seen chop in a similar fashion. I don't know if they hurt more/less, or are easier/harder to do, I just think it's neat when wrestlers do something basic in a different or unique way.
After landing his first chop, Yuto asks for more, tying his arms around the top rope to brace for more. Drilla Moloney, who is on commentary alongside Walker Stewart, comments on the "pro wrestling high" Yuto must be feeling here, urging him to ask for more punishment than he may be able to handle. A sweat-evaporating chop lands on the chest of Yuto, who falls off the ropes and is backed into a corner, with Tsuji lacing him with more Flair-style chops. Again, he asks for more, and Tsuji obliges. A particularly heavy-handed volley urges Yuto to back Tsuji to the ropes, bellowing in his face in defiance, with Tsuji responding the only way that Yuto may be receptive to-another chop to the chest, this one dropping him to a knee.
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| Eaten for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. NJPW |
It's important to note here, as this match is extremely chop heavy, 278 chops to be exact, with Tsuji delivering almost every single one, he does not let up or hold back on any of them. The first chop is delivered with almost the same intensity as chop 278, which is part of the story of this match. To some, it's the brilliance, to others, the utter foolishness.
Yuto comes back hard and heavy, catching Tsuji with a forearm shot and a boot that drops him to the canvas, sending Tsuji to the floor quickly and beginning to brawl towards the fans. Yuto nearly sends Tsuji into the chairs, but Tsuji reverses and sends Yuto careening into several rows of empty chairs. This is the start of one of the issues people have with this match, you can start your stopwatches here, but I'll save you the wait, Tsuji and Yuto spend 7 minutes outside on the floor. At one point, following the chop assault on Yuto, Tsuji rolls back in the ring and demands that referee Red Shoes wave off the 20 count for being outside the ring, leaving he and Yuto to brawl around with reckless abandon.
I was distracted a bit at this point during my first viewing, so I missed the length of time they were on the floor as well as Tsuji's waving of the referee's count, so it didn't bother me the first time, but upon a rewatch, I don't like it. It's one thing to have the referee dead in the ring or on the floor so they can do whatever they want on the floor (much like when The Undertaker and Triple H spent nearly 11 minutes on the floor at WrestleMania X7), but it's something else entirely when the referee is told "hey pal, let us have this. Cool?" The referee is there to uphold the rules and be the one to make sure things don't get out of hand, what's next? Tsuji grabs a chair and asks real politely "let me brain this dude real quick, cool?"
Anyways, we go on a full 360 tour of the floor in this match, with Tsuji laying into the chest of Yuto with heavy chops over and over again before moving him to a new spot to lace him with more offence. Red Shoes is on the floor to monitor the offence, but does little to break it up or try to restore any sort of order, just watching at points like another member of the audience.
We're back on the apron, finally, with more chops on a defiant Yuto, holding the ropes to keep himself from collapsing from the sheer brutality of the offence. Even when Tsuji collapses from the exhaustion of it all, Yuto eggs him on for more, not yet ready to give in. I will say this, Yuto's resilience here is pretty insane, to take as many hard-hitting chops as he has and not bend or break is an impressive showing of the classic Japanese "fighting spirit," but I do fear we are nearing the "jumping the shark " territory with this match as it moves further along.
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| The wounds of war. NJPW |
Selling the damage done to his hand, Tsuji lands one more chop before Yuto rolls back inside the ring, which begs the question, why don't we shape things up? If you've taken him all the way around the floor of the arena and back to the ring and he's still not effected by your chops, why don't we try, I dunno, a kick? A bodyslam? A piledriver? Maybe something that's more impactful? I understand Yuto, the crowd favourite here, is egging you on to lay into his chest with chops, but I'd have honestly preferred it if Tsuji kinda leaned heel for this match, denied his Unbound Co. companion the satisfaction of proving he is tough enough to take Tsuji's chops, keep him on the canvas and deny him the chance to get up and prove his resilience, wear him out that way, your way, instead of leaning into his requests. Just how I'd work the match, but what do I know, I just watch the graps.
Back inside the confines of the ropes, Yuto catches Tsuji with a forearm when he tries to pull him to his feet, with Tsuji responding... with a chop. See what I mean here, folks? I'm really struggling to make hay out of this match. The story is pretty fundamental when you break it down, Yuto is challenging Tsuji to give him his best, knowing he can withstand whatever assault Tsuji gives to him, especially his chops. It's a major gamble, but it ends up paying off for for Yuto later on in the match, as Tsuji doesn't change up his tactics for nearly the entire bout. He does take off for the ropes here to try and land something big on Yuto, but he gets caught with a boot in the gut and dropped to the canvas for his efforts.
Yuto lays into Tsuji with kicks that back him into the corner, drilling the champ with knees before marching across the ring and lining him up for a running knee strike to the face. A cover is made, but Tsuji gets out easily at two. If I can be honest, I'd have really liked to see Tsuji get out of that a lot easier than he did, considering the fact that Yuto has landed maybe a combined 10 strikes on him this entire match, while Tsuji has landed maybe 100 chops at this point. We're at like, 95/5 for damage done in this match, and it's not even close.
Catching a boot from Yuto, you'll never guess what Tsuji goes for next. A chop. A series in the corner drops Yuto, so Tsuji picks him up and delivers... another chop! This one is very heavy-handed, and Tsuji sells his hand well, with Yuto laid out flat on the canvas for a moment. Seating him on the top when he's able to muscle him up, Tsuji chops him on the top rope to soften his already softened opponent more. Taking too much time, however, Yuto is able to headbutt Tsuji off the top and back down to the canvas, climbing down from the top rope to save himself.
He catches a charging Tsuji with a pair of kicks to stagger him back, with Tsuji responding with a chop and a headbutt after eating a solid knee from Yuto. The look on his face reads both defiance and shock, finding it hard to believe that he is having this much of an issue putting Yuto down. Maybe trying other strikes or moves would help, but what do I know. Catching Tsuji before he can take off for the ropes, Yuto lands a clubbing lariat to the chest of Tsuji, bringing him down to the canvas like a sledgehammer.
Fighting up from the canvas, Yuto lands heavy forearm shots on a seated Tsuji, fighting hard to keep the champion off base. Back on their feet, Tsuji fights for feeling in his hand again before lacing Yuto with more chops, again and again, and Yuto stands firm, coming back with a kick that sends Tsuji to the ropes. They meet in the middle again, with Tsuji doing you-know-what and Yuto responding with a kick that drops the champ heavy. Maybe we should consider changing things up, no? A camera is able to catch a shot of Tsuji's open hands, his right a shade of red deeper than his left, the damage from the chops more than evident.
Back to the chops goes Tsuji, with Yuto still getting in his face to demand more, with the champ obliging. Like trying to chop down a tree with a butter knife, you'll get there eventually, but that knife will be duller than soap and a nub the size of a thimble by the time you get a quarter of the way through. But goddammit, I'll fell this tree!
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| What in the world?! NJPW |
Both men are sucking back pounds of air at this point, with Tsuji's face painted with confusion and disgust, looking at his hand and Yuto's chest as if to say "why isn't this working?!" Tsuji continues the chop assault, with Yuto holding onto his shorts to keep him standing, refusing to go down. Eventually, Tsuji falters, dropping to a knee during a chop salvo. Finally, Yuto's resilience has paid off, laying into the champ with a kick while he's down, but Tsuji catches the foot and... goes for another chop. Yuto fires off a kick to block another chop attempt, catching the arm of Tsuji and dropping him to a knee. Rebounding off the ropes not once but twice, a pair of kicks drop Tsuji and Yuto goes for a cover, but it's only two.
It's at this point they announce that we are twenty minutes deep into this match, which kinda blows my mind, and I'm not sure if it's in a good way or not. Pulling Tsuji to a seated position, Yuto grabs him by the hair and slaps him across the face, egging him on by demanding "make smile," with Tsuji's signature cocky smile fading away at this point in the match. Yuto lays into Tsuji with slaps across the face, waking the champion up to deliver a knee to the jaw of Yuto.
Finally, some different offence from Tsuji, with a kick backing Yuto into the corner and a running knee crushing him against the padding. Shooting him across the ring, Tsuji charges and connects with a running knee shot, pulling Yuto to the middle and landing a lariat to drop his foe. Catching his breath, Tsuji slowly marches to Yuto, standing over him and... chopping him while flat out on the canvas. We're back to this, eh? Mocking Yuto's hand gestures, Tsuji kicks him while he's down, but Yuto fires up to his feet, meeting his foe face to face.
A forearm-chop exchange starts in the middle, with Yuto getting the better of the exchange, dropping Tsuji not once, but twice! First with a kick, the second with a straight right to the jaw. Calling for a running knee out of the corner, Yuto charges, but gets caught with the Gene Blaster spear from Tsuji! It's a "mini" Gene Blaster, as Tsuji doesn't get the full distance, but he still goes for a cover and only gets two off the attempt.
Hitting the ropes twice, Tsuji drills Yuto with a massive Gene Blaster, getting the full force of the move this time. He covers for thr- WHAT?! Yuto kicks out at one?! Huh?! Punch drunk and barely alive, he staggers to his feet, with Tsuji lining him up for another Gene Blaster, but Yuto catches him with a knee to the face, following up with his running single leg dropkick, which he calls Cruella. Covering, Tsuji barely gets out at two, with Yuto crawling for the corner, pulling himself to his feet.
Calling for another running knee in the final 5 minutes of the 30 minute time limit, Tsuji catches his approach with a palm thrust to the jaw, with Yuto coming back with a kick upside the head. Charging, Tsuji snatches Yuto and drills him with Fireblaster, his modified Gene Blaster that looks like a spear with a modified side slam on the end of it. It's an odd finish, personally, but whatever works.
With both men laid out on the canvas, Moloney makes the point on commentary to say "all Tsuji has to do is the equivalent of turning over in bed and these men are so exhausted at the 25 minute mark," with the referee starting a double countout. At 8, Tsuji's leg moves, at 9, he grabs the second rope, and at 10, he's standing. Normally, these countouts only work when both men are down, result in a double down or a no contest, here, this match suddenly turns into last man standing. I don't have a massive problem with this finish like a lot of people do, but I can understand their complaints. I think my biggest issue with this is that Yuto got his ass beat for nearly the entire match, so it makes sense that he'd be down for the count. But Tsuji? Barely suffered in this one, aside from his right hand. So why is it so tough for him to get up? It strains credulity that the champ would have this much difficulty getting to his feet, unless Yuto is suddenly on his level as a result of this match. We can argue hierarchy until we're blue in the face, but it just doesn't make sense to me.
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| Fiya Blastaaaa! NJPW |
Match Time: 26:08
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| The end result of the match. NJPW |
On the one hand, I want to give Yuto's chest and Tsuji's hand 5 stars for their efforts in this match, this is a chop exchang- I mean, chop fight like few others. The comparison to Kobashi/Sasaki has been made to this match not only from Moloney on commentary, but by fans online, making this match out to be the modern equivalent of that match. But I have to strongly disagree with those opinions. It only takes a cursory viewing of these matches to realize they could not be more different if they tried, it's like comparing an apple to an orange. Both are fruits, both are sweet, and both are round, but the comparisons stop there. Both these matches happen in Japan, check, both are hard hitting, check, and both feature a copious amount of chops, check! But what separates this match from that one, is the story told. Kobash/Sasaki was two fighters that are as resilient as they come fighting for dominance, with the locking of the proverbial bull horns coming in the middle of the match with the disgusting 4 minutes and 21 seconds of their 186 chop fight. Outside those 4 and a half minutes, there was 19 minutes of wrestling happening, with holds, drops, bombs and slams adding to the legend of that match. This one, on the other hand, was nearly 30 minutes long, with perhaps 4 minutes and 21 seconds of actual wrestling happening, and perhaps 4 minutes and 21 seconds of Yuto being on top in any capacity. I didn't bother to time it, because I really didn't care enough to find out. I can't, in good consistence, give this match much more than 3 stars. It sat at 4 after my first viewing, but I had to revise my score once I started digging into it for the review. It just doesn't hold up to scrutiny, I'm afraid.
• • • • •
Until next week. Be well, stay safe, and love one another.
cliffmorganwstl@gmail.com
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